I’d kill for a bit of stability these days.

I’m currently at a point where there is no stable entity in my life. No stable job, no stable living arrangements, no stable relationship. It’s becoming increasingly hard to manage as, like a large and intricate domino puzzle, if one thing topples the rest will follow. As you can imagine, this leaves little room for planning, as everything is linked to each other. I can’t plan in advance for one thing, as it is critically effected by another.


I’m currently unsure if I’m going to be keeping my job. We have monthly targets, where I have to consistantly hit, or else I get told off. Now, I’ve tried getting better at my job, I honestly have, but I’m just really rubbish at sales. I’m not a salesman, never have been. I don’t enjoy it, and I don’t feel comfortable doing it. I’m all about providing good customer service, not about pressuring people into taking things they don’t require. Only problem with this is, if I don’t improve, I may lose my job, and I wouldn’t be able to afford to live here. Now I could always look for another job, however all other jobs are either A: Hard to get or B: rubbish pay. Meaning I still wouldn’t be able to live here. So, I should look to living somewhere else. However, if I’m currently on the line at my job, I don’t want to start a new contract, on a new place, only to find out I can’t even afford that one a little further down the line. See what I mean?

Just writing this makes me feel stressed! So sorry if its not the clearest summary you’ve ever read.

I really think its one of those situations where I’ve just got to leave it and see what happens. Normally, as long as you keep at it and don’t give up, things have a way of sorting themselves, which would take a load off my shoulders!




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