While I was free writing just now I realised that I’ve never really discussed my dreams. I’ve mentioned them, but they’re usually backed up with how I’ll ‘never be good enough‘ or how I’m ‘feeling so unmotivated‘ and I’ll ‘never achieve them‘. Well fuck that. I’m going to be positive.
I’m going to discuss my dreams and I’m going to argue Why I want to succeed in them.
Be an Author.
My main dream in life is to be an Author. A published author to be precise. I want to write books that people read. That last part is vital. I know every author talks about how they just love to write, how they just sit down and it happens. Well for me it doesn’t. At all. I write because I want it to be read and part of me doesn’t write anymore because I fear it wont be read, or wont be good enough for someone to read. It really stops me in my tracks. This might sound really selfish of me but I don’t want to do it for the money, I want to do it because I want to let people see my world and my imagination. I want people to enjoy things I’ve made. Surely writing just because I enjoy it is also selfish in a sense?
Work in the Video Games Industry.
I want to work in the Video Games Industry. I either want to make my own games, or I want to write my own articles about games. I’ve tried doing the latter on my blog over here, and I am going to try continue with it. I did have a short, very short, session of writing for Frugal Gaming, which I was enjoying, but there seemed to be a lack of care and I got disheartened. But still! Watch this space as I have a piece coming up shortly on Crowd Funding, which is my new favourite thing.
If the former part of my dream came true and I actually worked on a game… well… I just can’t see me achieving this one properly and I’d probably faint. I’d absolutely love to help write a story, or a character, or a concept. I can’t draw to save my life and I can probably program less well than I can draw. This is why I doubt I’ll succeed. There are too many people out there with too many ideas. Its a hard industry to crack. But maybe, just maybe, I can find a way in. Whether I can write journalist articles and one day get a story into a game, or I can become rich and fund a team to help make a game, or maybe I’ll hit my first dream and become a famous author… Who knows. Either way… I want to go to E3!
Short film, Sitcom, Documentary. Something. I am itching to be behind a camera. I just need an idea and a way of doing it. Woody has a degree in Film and I’ve helped him on his past projects. I’ve always loved helping and loved the idea of bringing something to life on camera. We both want to do something and, if we had it our way, would be doing it by now. However we need ideas, equipment, and people. Films require actors, the number may vary, and this is something Woody and I don’t know how to deal with. If we write a film, we’d have to get actors in, but why would they want to work with us if they think we’re only doing it for fun? Same with a Documentary. After some of the Documentaries I’ve watched recently I’ve decided I’d love to make a documentary. However I have no topic, or reason. I can’t juts document something because I want to, can I? Or can I…
Put something in a gallery.
This is a lesser known one of my dreams. When I’m really into my photography and really enjoying taking pictures I start to think ‘One day I want to be in a gallery’. Whether its a little charity one, or something even a few photographer friends are running, I’d love to just see my picture up there with the rest.
So there you have it. These are my dreams and aspirations. They’re the things I think about almost every day. I’ve heard people say “They’re called dreams because you never reach them” but I don’t believe this. Its like doing exercise. You aim higher than you can currently reach and, when you get there, you reset the bar. I think I can reach my dreams and, at the back of my head, I know that some day I will. Whether thats next week, in a year, or even after I’m retired, I’m going to get there and, when I’ve reached them, I’ll set some others!
Maybe I didn’t stick with the positivity all the way though, there’s quite a bit of negative in there, but I think the general message I want to leave you with is These are my dreams and I will chase them!